Saturday, August 7, 2010
8.7.10 – Insight
This will be the 333rd blog entry/short film, so I’m just about a month shy of finishing this one-a-day project. Lately I haven’t felt I’ve been putting my all into it each day. Being sick didn’t help, but I’m still feeling distracted since my mother’s passing last month. I think besides dredging up a lot of bad memories, it reminded me that I’m still not doing what I want to be doing. I’m trying, and I’m a lot farther along than I was several years ago when I was acting at being a fundraising.
It was so important to me to not turn into my parents or siblings that I ended up trying to become the polar opposite, which really wasn’t who I am. I’m not going to whine about it like on daytime television. I was an adult. No one made me do the things I did or take the jobs I did or pass up on the opportunities that I did. Of course taking the long way probably, and more definitively, made me realize who I am, what I want to do, and what I want in my life than if I had chosen the correct path at a younger age.
I’m hoping this insight leads to some actual work getting done soon.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
A friend told me she read an interview with musician Rufus Wainwright, whose mother died last year (?), and he said one of the best things he heard in response was that a mother gives birth to her child twice:
ReplyDeleteonce at the chid's birth and again at the mother's death.
This has been true for me.
Not easy, but true.
I offer it for what it's worth...
Godspeed on doing your life work.
Thanks, Fresca. I love Rufus Wainwright.
ReplyDeleteAnother friend commented to me that a mother's passing can be a great release of stored up energy. I'm hoping I can put it to good use.